“Life contains but two tragedies. One is not to get your heart’s desire; the other is to get it.” – Socrates
Ever paused to actually reflect on what you have been through in life and how it has shaped you into the person you are today? That is what I want to talk about today, how things will go wrong and how you move past that and continue your journey to mastery.
But before we get into that, tell me, how do you handle a situation where you have been working so hard on your marriage and one day you walk into your bedroom and your wife says she wants a divorce cause she doesn’t love you anymore?
How do you lead a multi-million dollar or fortune 500 company yet you can’t control your teenage son and their rebellion? How do you bounce back from surviving a near-fatal accident only to be diagnosed with cancer a few months later?
How do you transition from running what you thought was a successful enterprise to going back on the job market and living on minimum wage? How do you fall in love again after every man you have been with keeps taking a piece of you away when they leave you?
How does a healthy, happy and young couple fail to conceive a child? How does someone fail to stick to a single goal that will change their life for just 30 days?
My answer to all these scenarios is simple. Life happens, and we have to suck it up and deal with it.
A bit harsh you may say but consider this idea: a bird in flight. The bird lives totally in the moment, completely focused on its flight, perhaps using its sharp eyes to search for food. Just one thing to focus on, flying.
It doesn’t start thinking, “Why does it have to be so cold here? What do the other birds think of me? What am I going to do when I meet up with the other birds later? Will I be successful at nest building? Why are my feathers like this? Why can’t I have bigger breasts? Why can’t I wake up earlier like the other birds?” Of course, as humans, we have bigger brains than the bird, and we can solve problems and create poetry and build skyscrapers. Yet these big brains cause the problems with overthinking things, feeling anxiety and frustration and depression and anger over the things that happen to us and might happen to us and have already happened to us but that we can’t stop thinking about.
Letting go is the key that unlocks your freedom from life happening around you, understanding your worth and knowing that everything is not going to be smooth sailing is a game changer.
Below are 7 major things I want you to let go as we move into the new month, and hopefully move you closer to finding and fulfilling your purpose.
Our stress comes from wanting things to be a certain way, and then we get stressed when things inevitably don’t go that way. But if we could let go of how we wanted it to be and accepted and appreciated reality as it is, we would let go of the stress.
We procrastinate because of a fear of failure, hard tasks, confusion, discomfort. But if we could let go of wanting things to be easy, successful, comfortable … and just accept that there is a wide range of experiences, we could just do the task.
• Habits & distractions:
By the way, most people have a hard time changing habits for this same reason — we procrastinate on the habit just like we procrastinate on work tasks. We also go to distractions all day long for the same reasons.
• Irritation/frustration with people:
We get irritated with people because they don’t behave the way we’d like. And this damages our relationships with them because we’re angry at them. It makes us less happy. Instead, we could let go of wanting them to be a certain way, accept them as they are, and either just be with them or leave them. It makes the relationship much better.
• Loss & death:
When a loved one dies, or we lose a job, or we get a major illness, this is a loss that causes grieving and suffering. And while that’s unavoidable (and we should accept our grieving), being able to let go helps us to deal with this loss.
• Being present: Many of us would like to be more present in life so that we don’t miss it as it happens. So that we can enjoy it fully. Imagine having a delicious dish in front of you, and you eat it but are thinking about work while you chew … you’d be missing out on the flavours of the dish. But if you could give it your full attention, you’d fully appreciate the dish. Life is exactly like this … we are so obsessed with thinking about other things, that we can’t be present in the moment. We can learn to let go of this future- or past-oriented thinking, and be more present.
The root of our problems is fear — from procrastination to not starting a business to being overweight — and the root of fear is holding onto how we want things to be and not anticipating that life will happen. It’s enough to note that if we can let go of or loosen up on how we really want things to be, we can loosen up the fear as well.Letting go is the key that unlocks your freedom from life happening around you, understanding your worth and knowing that everything is not going to be smooth sailing is a game changer. Click To Tweet
This famous quote by Reinhold Niebuhr rings true:
“Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.”
Let this be your mantra in this coming month.