“Real transformation requires real honesty. If you want to move forward – get real with yourself.” Bryant McGill
Have you ever taken the time to ask yourself what it takes to be better or succeed? It takes time, focus, perseverance, feedback, opportunity. It’s far more complex and difficult than rolling out a program, printing a poster and logging into an app.
Deliberate transformation takes time. Deliberate transformation takes discipline. It takes dedication, but believe me, it is worth it.
Last week, I spoke in depth about deliberate practice. How we need to be focussed on the execution of our skills if we are to master our craft. Moving onto deliberate transformation, I want to talk about 5 key elements that will make the change smoother.
Let’s face it, we all have complexities, such as personal detrimental characteristics that we cannot take with us to the positive that life has for us. These may be but not limited to pride, greed, selfishness, bitterness, strongholds of some sort like (fear), insecurity or hunger for power. Many people are often rigid or stubborn in this phase because they hardly look at themselves as being the problem.Dysfunction is not a circumstance around you but a condition inside you that needs to be worked on. Click To Tweet
Deliberate transformation reveals your hidden and suppressed desires and behaviour, it deals with you on a personal level. This means you need to allow it to change through its positive traits. By letting it mould and modify your character, making you more patient, long-suffering, hard-working or stable through the unstable environment it will expose you to.
In my book World War You, I talk about it like this ” Dysfunction is not a circumstance around you but a condition inside you that needs to be worked on. In other words, things are not working for you not because the things around you are the problem but rather YOU are the problem.” Let’s pause and think about that.
It is a bit heavy I know but it is also true, and this leads me back to these 5 major keys that allow us to understand why deliberate transformation is necessary. Think of it this way.
Training – introduces us to new material.
Coaching – makes it personal.
Mentoring – embeds the transformation.
Sponsorship – takes is further.
Advocacy – leverages your transformation.
The starting point to any transformation process is to know where you are and then decide on where you want to be. The journey in the middle is one of learn, do, relearn, redo. And perhaps more importantly, I have noticed that helping someone see the progress they have made is critical to them seeing they have changed, knowing they can change, and having a sense of confidence that the change will serve their goals.The starting point to any transformation process is to know where you are and then decide on where you want to be. Click To Tweet
Based on those 5 keys, we are positioned in either one of these 4 spaces in our transformation journey.
- Stuck – with a fixed mindset and skillset. You are making no progress and largely unaware of your circumstances. It is what it is and you can’t see a way forward to change it. You are unconsciously incompetent and you haven’t got the awareness or resources to know what to do next. It’s both disaster and disappointment waiting to happen.
- When you and here, you need to stop. Evaluate and make one significant change towards your preferred future.
- Stationary – with a fixed skillset and an agile mindset. Mentally you are growing but not translating that into changed action and behaviours. You intellectualise everything and have reasons (excuses) for why there is an uplift in your knowledge but nothing seems to largely change in your behaviour. Like Newtons Second law you continue at a state of rest. It looks busy but progress is slow or non-existent. You know you need to change but you are not changing and this is a dangerous place to be. When you are here, you need to place yourself in an accountable relationship where the motivation to change is high and the cost of not changing is great. Disciplined growth is your key to progress.
- Sabotage – with a fixed mindset and an agile skillset. You have natural skills but feel like you have hit a wall. Your best option is to “do” your way through this but the real change lies deep in your head and heart. You reflect the Joseph Campbell quote “The cave you fear to enter holds the treasure that you seek.” This is not a matter of your competency, it’s an issue of your maturity and formation. If you feel you are here, you need to sit with a trusted advisor or mentor and ask them to act as a mirror for you. Tell you the things you know deep down to be true but need help and support to face, challenge and change.
- Moving – having an agile skillset and flexible mindset. You have taken the time to challenge your thinking and learn new attitudes and mindsets. And you have also leaned into opportunities and experiences that have added to and sharpened your skills. You are self-aware yet walk with a sense of self-confidence and humility. You know you are adding value and you are now focused on adding value to others.
If you are at this stage, your transformation journey is on track. You cannot fix others before you fix yourself. Knowing yourself better and being better means the rest of the world gets to interact with a more finer version of you.
In order for us to move closer to the Moving stage, the following steps can be actioned and revised when necessary.
- Be clear about your current reality.
- Engage a coach and/or mentor.
- Implement new thinking and skills as fast as possible.
- Practice reflections IN action. Evaluate and adjust where needed.
- Create a culture that calls UP the best in you and others.
So be it in business, your career or relationships. If you need to change for the better, be deliberate and honest with yourself. Address the stage your journey is at and make the necessary adjustments to be better.
Get your life back, it is the only one you have.