The Double D’s
“It is the set of the sails, not the direction of the wind that determines which way we will go.” – Jim Rohn
There are only two things you need to get clear on to start your year really really well, direction and determination. I call these the Double D’s.
- Be clear about where you want to end up.
- Have the personal commitment to getting there.
Direction – A clear and compelling picture of where you want to be.
Determination – The personal conviction and commitment to get there.
Now, in last week’s post, we spoke about the questions you need to ask yourself in order to set a firm foundation for your year. In this one allow me to breakdown the framework you need to implement in order to achieve your desired outcome.
Failure brings out 4 main traits in us as people, we either get motivated, disappointed, frustrated, or confused. Below you will see a model that explains these traits.
You can do anything, but not everything Felicia. Tweet MeTHE DOUBLE D’s MODEL – WHERE GROWTH HAPPENS
The Model Explained
Low Direction and Low Determination
YOU ARE FRUSTRATED
This person is busy, really really busy. But not accomplishing anything. They are busy doing nothing. For those who want to make something of themselves and their opportunities, this is immensely frustrating. It feels like all this time and money is being used up for no good outcome.
Your first step to transformation is to get help to discover your WHY and your WHO. This helps to connect purpose to a person.
Clear Direction and Low Determination
YOU ARE DISAPPOINTED
This person has either decided to quit already or is really close to letting it go, for any number of reasons. And it’s not the first time, in fact, as you look back, your career or work has a series of “nearly got there” stories, and the excuse narrative is a well-worn path.
It just seems to be too hard sometimes. And it IS HARD. What makes it even harder is quitting and having to regain all that momentum again.
Your best action is to expect obstacles, plan for them, and create a pit crew to be part of the challenge with you. To call more out of you WHEN it gets hard. To push through and overcome the temptation to quit too soon. Writing this reminds me of Gym Trainers who know how to get more from a person in the final 4 seconds of a round, just by encouraging them.
Quick Caveat – If continuing is physically or mentally damaging you it’s imperative you seek appropriate help right now. We love you too much to be hurt by hanging on for no good reason, I realise it’s counter-intuitive but you get it right?
Low Direction and High Determination
YOU ARE CONFUSED
This person consistently puts the effort in but seems to miss the mark each time. Like those viral videos of runners taking the wrong turn or celebrating one lap too early. It’s just too painful to watch.
All that effort to end up where you DON’T want to be.
Without clear direction, a compelling North Star, you will end up where you don’t want to be and find yourself some combination of confused, bemused, and angry. Asking yourself how this happened since you worked so hard all the time and put the big hours in. For this!
The confusion is directly related to having no clear direction. You don’t know where you want to end up so when you get where you don’t want to be you throw your hands in the air in annoyance. You work hard to get……where? Not where you want to be, that’s for certain.
The next best step is to stop, pause, dream again and take some time to get crystal clear about what you want from your year and where you plan to end up.
A compelling and motivating direction clears up all your confusion. Have a strong WHY and the HOW will become so fluid and easy.
High Direction and High Determination
YOU ARE MOTIVATED
There’s something magical about knowing where you want to end up and having the conviction to get there. The clarity creates its own power, you can see it, feel it, taste it. You can’t wait to move towards it. Yesterday I had a moment of reflection and I found myself excited about the future what it holds for me personally. Just the thought of being able to be with someone and do amazing things just gave me a warm feeling inside. A straight “you can do this” feeling.
This kind of conviction and determination create resolve, give you context for challenges, and invites you to be agile and innovative as you work towards your objectives.
At this point, remember who this is for and remind yourself regularly of the purpose and the payoff. It’s huge. It also challenges you to BE the kind of person who can accomplish these goals. To do the personal work, make the disciplined decisions and sacrifices it takes for the dream to be real.
FIVE PRACTICAL STEPS TO MAKE DIRECTION AND DETERMINATION WORK FOR YOU.
ONE
Lead with life themes.
Themes are better than goals
At the start of the year, we spoke of the power of one word, and that being the theme for your year. Here’s how it all comes together. A theme is either a responsibility you have in life or a role you have in work. Themes are a BIG IDEA and goals are smaller targets that sit under the themes. Like a headline with bullet points. When you theme out your life you can more easily and more quickly attach a meaningful goal to it.
TWO
Tension, don’t order, your priorities.
You can do anything, but not everything Felicia.
When you work, work. When you play, play. Don’t play at work and don’t rob yourself and your loved ones of the time you’ve given to them. Do what needs to be done at the right time and never feel guilty for re-creating with people and activities you love.
This uneven allocation of time will help you work even more effectively, and be even more present each time, in every activity, with every person.
THREE
Look back, Look in, Look up.
Clarity is better than certainty.
You work out what to do by what history taught you, your present reality and expectations as well as your future dreams and hopes.
Learn from your past, dream wildly about what could be, and remain optimistic about the future. That alone will help you work out who you can become and what you could do.
FOUR
Measure Milestones AND Goals
Seek progress, not perfection.
Jon Acuff in his book “Finish – give yourself the gift of done” talks about how perfectionism is the biggest obstacle to making progress. He says “This is the first lie that perfectionism tells you about goals: Quit if it isn’t perfect.”
More often than not, seeing that you have made purposeful progress in the right direction can be enough to stay motivated and committed to your dream. Measure your milestones in the context of your goals.
FIVE
Expect the “Big Three” Challenges
Distraction. Disappointment. Discouragement.
You cannot and must not avoid challenges, they will come. The key is being prepared for them as best as you know-how and have a way of responding to them that is measured, wise, and commensurate to the challenge you’re facing.
- Distraction is when you realise you are off track. The antidote to distraction is not to focus, it’s stillness. Just stop and be still.
- Disappointment is when something or someone lets you down. The antidote to disappointment is to release forgiveness. Trust me, this heals you more than them.
- Discouragement is when it seems all too hard and the dream you started with and the reality you have are worlds apart. The antidote to discouragement is not courage, it’s perspective. Change how you see things, and you will see a way out.
By way of afterthought, it would also help to write down a list of WHO benefits by you doing the year well.
- You do, you can be proud of who you become and what you get done.
- Your closest relationships do, they get the best of you not the rest of you.
- Your purpose benefits, you get better and can do more.
- The world is a better place because of your contribution and impact.
As I look at it, that seems worth it for you to have your best year ever. So go out there and be intentional about what sort of year you are going to have. As always I hope you and yours are safe and doing well. You have amazing and powerful dreams, do not doubt the impact of your purpose. The world awaits. May it be so. Let’s Go!
Photo Credit: Photo by Airam Vargas from Pexels
